Committed to Improvement (while ignoring the numbers)
by Emily Killinger
This is the story of how CrossFit helped change my life. It had been seven years since our daughter was born, and other than going on family hikes, canoe paddles and an occasional bike ride, I hadn’t made any extra efforts to lose the “baby weight”. At that point I couldn’t even claim it was baby weight anymore, as each year my weight increased little by little, until my clothes had to be replaced with even larger sizes (repeatedly). I stopped weighing myself at 190 pounds, as I was scared and feared it had crept up to 200 or even more (eeeek). So I stayed far away from scales and the ever increasing numbers. At the time, I believed I ate fairly healthy, was active enough and was in ok health for my age. Not to mention I had convinced myself that I didn’t even have an hour to spare in the day to workout at a gym.
That summer after seeing photographs of myself, I started realizing what the years of increasing weight gain really looked like on me. I knew I could no longer ignore the truth; I was unhealthy, uncomfortable in my own skin and desperately needed to make a change for the better. As I saw it God only gave me one body and if I wanted it to take me well into the future I needed to start taking better care of it. So the search for a gym began. I knew from previous experience that a typical gym would not motivate me, nor would I be able to guide or push myself through workouts that would maximize the results I desperately wanted. I was familiar with the high intensity that CrossFit offered due to my best friend and her husband being owners of a CrossFit box in Florida. I began by looking at the list of approved gyms which my insurance company would give me membership reimbursement, if I attended at least 8 times a month. Lo and behold I found Battle CrossFit on that list! I called the number listed and scheduled my first visit with Coach Justin.
The day I walked in for my “Fit-Test”, I instantly knew I was in the right place. I could feel the encouragement and the support that swirls around the athletes, coaches and owners of Battle CrossFit. I committed myself to it and worked hard to complete my on-ramp training and join the regular classes. I met many new friends that all cheered me on as I would finish the WOD after everyone else. Everyone at Battle CrossFit made me feel like I was part of a big supportive family. Eventually people started seeing results from my hard work, as they began asking how much weight I had lost. I would simply say “I don’t know,” as I continued to stay away from the scale. The number didn’t matter to me; all that mattered to me was that I continued to make improvements to my body. Each PR (CrossFit lingo for Personal Record) was a new accomplishment, an improvement from before – a step in a better direction. The body I had become ashamed of, and was scared to take forward through the rest of my life was getting better (for a long future). My consistency and hard work was slowly paying off! The loads of encouragement from my Battle-Family kept me motivated.
However I still didn’t want to be ruled by the numbers on a scale and beat myself up when those numbers would fluctuate. I knew that my new lifestyle of working out with intensity (WOD-ing) wasn’t enough to get me back to a pre-pregnancy weight, which I desired. So just after the New Year, I signed up to participate in a Paleo eating challenge with Battle CrossFit, through Lurong Living – A sort of New Year’s resolution to continue to improve my body.
I continued to not care about “the numbers” from the beginning weigh-in all the way through to the ending weigh-in. After the five week challenge, the results were in and they were dramatic. Even though I had hoped for a larger decrease to my overall weight, I was excited to be down 2.25 lbs. on both my waist and hip measurements. The numbers had given me a confirmation of what I was noticing in the mirror and the change that others were noticing in me as well. So for all you number crunchers out there this is a quick look at my results:
The clothing sizes still continue to go down. In fact I finally had to get rid of much of my clothing as it was simply sliding right off of me (yeah!). After that first Paleo challenge I reflected and thought about how many years it took me to build up to my maximum weight (approximately seven years), and then I looked at what I was able to accomplish in less than two years and I was impressed with the 180 degree U-turn I had made in my overall body and my health. I am so proud of what I have accomplished and each and every PR I experience. Because a new PR, no matter what the number is, is an improvement! I now bask in the glory of any and all improvements, no matter what the number is because I still don’t pay attention to “the numbers”. I couldn’t have achieved any of it without my support team: my family and my Battle CrossFit-Family! Thank you to everyone for all your support and for continually cheering me on. I am devoted to the continual improvement of my body and mind. I will continue to not allow numbers to rule me or my life. I am constantly reminded it’s not about how I compare to others at the gym or others in life (in regards to looks or workout results), it’s about how I feel about myself and the daily choices I make to be the best that I can be. I’m going to continue improving this body of mine until the day I die and I know Battle CrossFit and my Battle-Family will be by my side the entire way.